You have decided to take the plunge and sign up for a hookup site or two. You want to see what it’s all about and you are ready for some very casual relationships whether they are a one-night stand or even a friend with benefits situation. However, if you are brand new to this, you might have some concerns on just what you need to do in order to get started, and more importantly, find success, when you join these sites.
Below, we will be covering some of the most important things that you need to do and keep in mind when it comes to using a hookup site. We want you to succeed as much as you want to succeed!
Choose a Quality Hookup Site
If you want to have success with a hookup site, you need to start your journey with some of the best hookup sites available. Take the time to research the various options that look interesting to you whether they are a general hookup site or a niche site that caters to certain preferences.
Check to see what features and options are available with the site, as well as what types of memberships are possible. Some of the sites will have free memberships, along with premier sites that offer access to more features of the site.
However, a paid membership does not always mean the site is worth your time. You need to look at all of the pros and cons of the site and check out some reviews. Make sure it is the right site for you, and don’t be afraid to cancel a membership and try another site if you need. Just give the site a chance to work before you dismiss it. A good hookup site is going to make all the difference when it comes to finding hookups.
Get to Know the Features
Once you have chosen a hookup site to use, it is time to get to know all of the features it offers. These features are there to help make the hookups easier for you, so you need to put in the effort to learn how to use them. There are many types of features that could be a part of the hookup site, such as advanced search options, chatrooms, video chatting, and the like. Different sites will have different types of features. While you might not need to use all of the features, you should at least know what they are, what they can do, and how to use them.
Fill Out Your Profile
One of the biggest mistakes that many people – particularly men – make when it comes to using hookup sites is not filling out their profile with anything but the basic information. They think that because it is a hookup site, they have to do less work, and there is no point in filling out a profile or even adding a picture. That’s not true though. Even though it is a hookup, people still want to have an idea of what the other person looks like. After all, they want to be happy and comfortable with the hookup, as well. It’s not all about you.
You need to make yourself appealing through the profile. However, you don’t want to lie on the profile. This is another one of the mistakes that many people make. They make themselves seem better than they actually are on the profile, and they put up fake pictures. When you actually meet the person for the hookup, they are going to realize that you put up a fake photo, and they are not going to be any happier than you would be if someone else showed up to meet you. Honesty really will help you find the right hookups for you.
Talk a bit about yourself, be honest and open, and talk about the things that you like, including kinks and fetishes, and what you might be willing to try. You should not tell stories of your past encounters, and there is a difference between giving people an idea of what you want and like and being vulgar. Never cross the line to vulgar. It’s not going to do you any favors.
Filling out the profile is going to help you show up in search results on the site, as well. If you don’t have any information about yourself on the site – even your basic stats like height, weight, hair color, etc. – you aren’t going to appear in search results. This means it will be next to impossible to find you, and that could be why you aren’t getting any traction on the site.
Don’t Fall for Fake Profiles
Of course, this is the Internet. There are bound to be fake profiles out there, and there will always be people who fall for them. Do not be like those people. Learn how to spot the fake profiles and ignore them.
One of the most common types of fake profiles that you may come across are those from escorts and cam models. The photos almost always appear as though they have been professionally taken, and these will likely be the first profiles that contact you – sometimes before you have your profile completed. They might seem legitimate at first, but they will soon ask you to click on a link to their web camera, or they will want to hookup, both of which they say will cost you. You want a mutual hookup; you aren’t using these sites to pay for sex.
In fact, if a profile has a link in it – any sort of link – you can assume that it is a fake profile. The links could even have viruses when you click on them and visit whatever site they send you to. Anything on the profile that doesn’t seem to match up, or that seems too good to be true, probably is. Avoid those profiles.
There are plenty of real people on these sites that are looking for the same thing you are – a hookup. Take the time to find them and avoid those fake profiles with the “models” that are interested in you for some reason.
Be Involved on the Site
While you are on a hookup site, that doesn’t mean that you just put up your profile, brush off your hands, and wait. You need to be involved on the site. This simply means actively looking for hookups and not waiting for someone to find you. While it’s certainly possible and it does happen, you will generally find hookups faster when you are involved actively looking for people that interest you, connecting with people in forums and chatrooms, and engaging with the other people on the site.
Flirting Still Works
Just because you are online, and you are on a hookup site, that doesn’t mean that a good flirting game is obsolete. In fact, when you know how to flirt with people online, it can often put you ahead of the other people on the site when it comes to finding a hookup. You want to be confident when you are flirting, but you do not want to come across as being pompous or having a large ego.
In addition, you do not want to use the pickup lines that you’ve heard from pickup artists. Most of the time, they aren’t going to work, and they are going to make you look childish.
The first contact that you have with people online should not be overtly sexual in nature. Sure, there are some who would not mind that tactic, but most want to develop a dialogue before things start to get dirty. It’s a hookup site, but you still have to put in some work if you want it to work for you. You must always treat the other person with respect. It does not matter if you are only going to see them a couple of times or just for a one-night stand.
Be Willing to Meet Somewhere Safe
When you have found someone who wants to hookup, you will have to set up a time and a place to meet. In some cases, he or she might say that you can come over to their place or they can come to yours, or that you can meet at a hotel, for example. However, people tend to want to be safe, and that means they will want to meet in a neutral location first.
This gives them a sense of safety. It is also safer for you. They know that in a location where there are other people, such as a coffee shop or a restaurant, they can get a better sense of who you are and what you want. They will see if you were honest about your profile and your picture, and you can do the same. They can have some time to get to know you before they agree to hook up with you.
If someone doesn’t want to hook up with you for one reason or another, whether it is before you meet or after, don’t get upset about it. Be an adult and move on to find a person who does want to meet with you and hook up.
Don’t Get Emotionally Invested
A problem that some people have encountered is finding someone on a hookup site that they really like. It’s about more than sex, and they develop an emotional attachment to that person. This is a huge problem, particularly when the other person was just looking for a hookup, as well. If you ever start to feel an emotional attachment, you need to let the other person know and then back out of the casual hookup relationship you have developed. If you aren’t proactive, it is only going to cause heartache, and that’s the opposite of what a hookup site should bring!
Use Multiple Hookup Sites
Instead of focusing on just one site, you might want to consider the possibility of joining multiple sites. However, you always need to make sure you are working with a good site that is worth your time and money. Vet the site, check reviews, and make sure the features of the site are worth the cost. You can always find some free hookup sites that could work, as well, and then upgrade to a premium account if you like what you see.
One of the caveats to this is choosing sites that are so similar that they have a lot of overlap between the membership base. If two sites have the same members, the only thing you are doing by having a membership with both is wasting money. A good option is to choose a general hookup site, as well as a niche site.
Also, never feel tied to a site. You want to give them time to work, but if you find that a site just isn’t paying off for you, cancel your membership. Then, move on to another site that works better for your needs.
It Can Take Time
Before you cancel any of your memberships though, you will want to make sure you have given the site time to work. In some cases, people can get on a site, fill out their profile and find a hookup in a matter of days – even less time in some cases. However, that’s not the norm. It takes time for your profile and information to get into the system. You need to be on the site interacting with people regularly and you need to realize that it can take time to work. Don’t give up on the site right away.
When you understand the basics, work with some of the best hookup sites, fill out your profile, and follow the other tips suggested here, it can help to improve your chances at finding those hookups you want. Plenty of people out there want the same things that you do. Now, you just have to put these practices into action.